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Writer's pictureLovey Shivers

Set for heartaches

Set for heartaches


The older I get the more I wish I had lived during a different century. I guess you could say. I have been told that I have an old soul, and the more I experience in life today, the more I understand that statement.


Many may agree with me when I say, technology has ruined our way of living. Yes, technology has made certain things better in our lives, but when it comes to relationships, it has done nothing but fail us. Technology and relationships today, is why I wish I had lived during a different time era. An era before social media and text messaging, internet and cell phones ever existed. 


I grew up with grandparents that met in middle school, became middle school sweethearts who then later married and loved only one another for over 50 years until they took their last breaths. A loving relationship like my grandparents had, is hardly seen in today's society. I’m almost 41 years old, and I cannot name another couple with a true lasting relationship such as theirs. But I still pray that I will get a chance to find a love like theirs. 


I may not be the brightest star, but I’m not dull enough to know I have to accept life as it may be. Technology has set us, or maybe just me, up for failure or maybe I should say heartache. Technology allows eyes and hormones to wander to of the inquisitive, thirsty “spouses.” Any “itch” or “desired craving” is just a click away. Respect for your partner is thrown aside by selfish needs and desires. Because to some, getting that quick nut that comes with no strings attached or any “ol ball and chain” is so much better for any self centered individual. There’s no need for some dumb relationship that just costs time, money, and conversations that you have no desire for. 


To this type of person, technology is amazing. With just a click on the internet, you can find anything - especially their favorite- escorts. That perfect no strings attached person to take care of business. There are apps now for anything and everything, such as dating apps or social media apps like TikTok and instagram. These are a little tricky to that technology loving person because you have to weed out whether the person you searched has strings or not. But when it’s only about you yourself, you have all the time in the world to weed out your likes and dislikes. 


As for someone like me, technology has had a different experience. Thanks to technology, I was sent a message, and asked out by a guy I ended up falling in love with and planned on spending the rest of my life with. Thanks to technology, I’d walk around with a cheesy smile staring at my phone because my love would text me all day long when away, which made being apart manageable. That is until things weren’t manageable anymore. Texts started coming less and less and conversations were left for face to face time at home. However technology informed me that his conversations were only less and less with me. Technology was giving him everything he wanted, and giving me the call logs that provided phone numbers with dates and times. Then technology provided me the tools to search the numbers  and finding out what no strings attached person was helping break my heart by satisfying him. Technology use to be there to help me know when to have dinner ready for when my other half came home from work, now it’s just here for me to order dinner for 1 because now there’s always some late night at work or some other side job keeping his attention while he strongly believes he doesn’t have to explain his plans or doings with anyone, especially me. While technology may be here for me to call for help when sick, it sure isn’t here for me to get any calls to see if I’m okay or need anything by the only person I want by my side and that knows I’m sick. 


Technology set me up for failure - failed love, failed relationship, and even failed me mentally. Technology has shown me how I’m not worthy of happiness and love, how I don't look like those women that he would rather talk to then to come to bed with me. How I don’t deserve the respect of a simple phone call or text because I flat out don’t concern him. Technology is torturing me, breaking me day after day, showing me every reason to accept that there is no growing old together while happy in love. And at same time sharing memories of years back when there was happiness and a love so indescribable, you still know what it felt like just looking at the picture. But just like that, technology breaks another part of you by making his phone chirp as he walks back out that door giving me nothing but heartache. 

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