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Pushing Me Away

Updated: Apr 7, 2021

I hope you know you are pushing me away. I used to think of you as my forever. And now all I think about is how I wanted happily ever after. Everyday all I want is you. I can’t wait for you to get off work. Everywhere I go, you are who comes to my mind, with questions of "I wonder if he would like this? I wonder if he could use that? Oh, I wonder if he would enjoy this for dinner? I’d love him to be warm with something like that." Valentine’s Day has always been my favorite holiday for as long as I can remember! I always say it’s because of my name, Lovey, which has Love, so of course, I have to just love it! If it's hearts and love and lips and kisses, oh my, I have to have it! I started to buy for you already, but now I just want to return it all. I got you a silver chain and motorcycle charm yesterday. When I saw it I was like omg I have to get it for him to wear when he rides the Harley. I barely got a thank you. I think I’ll just go out and buy for my own Valentine’s Day bc otherwise, I’ll miss out on all the beautiful things that are out for this day only. You used to make me smile more than I had in so many years. Now I cry more than smile day in and day out. I’m constantly thinking of how to make you smile when I guess I need to start thinking more about how to keep you from frowning. There’s more negative of what I am doing wrong or how I’m bothering you than there is ever what I have done well. I get so excited when you're coming home and I can’t even wait till I get to you. But the second you lay eyes on me I see the feelings never going to be mutual

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