1 Year

So here we are, exactly one year that I have been out. Finally free from all legal problems, sentences and everything that was holding me back for far too long.

When I was getting out last year, I had what I thought to be everything planned on how I was starting my new chance at life. I had planned to live in Columbus and even had a job lined up there as well. I was supposed be living with whom I thought at the time, was one of my best friends. I was rebuilding relationships with friends and some family. I was going to have a new shot in life, never looking back at all that bad that I had lived for so many years.

However, life had other plans for me. I find that it always seems to be when I plan something, it never goes as planned! It’s like I’m better off just going with the flow and just live day to day, because every time I plan something and get my hopes up, I just get let down and hurt once again.

There I was on that 17th day, February of 2020. Freshly out of incarceration and right back in Middletown, the one place that I had sworn I wasn’t going back to. Yet there I was but was only suppose to be there 2 weeks, waiting for my move. Again, as life decided for me, what I had planned was not going to be what I was dealt.

First off, let me say I am in complete disbelief that it’s already been a year. it doesn’t even seem like I have been out a year already! To sit thinking about what this past year has been like, I mean I can’t even begin to describe how I feel. I have definitely gone through things that I had sworn to myself I wasn’t going to deal with again, such as being homeless, or having to live certain ways. After doing it for as long as I had before getting locked up, I swore I wouldn’t nor couldn’t go back to that again.

Sometimes in life you don’t get a choice and it seemed like no matter how hard I fought or how hard I tried, everywhere I turned I just hit one wall after another. I took one bad blow after the next. This past year i managed while being homeless to have everything I owned to my name, being taken for the probably billionth time, in just the time Id lived in Middletown. Some days I really didn’t know how to live just one more day.

Getting from that point in my life to where I am now, I can’t even begin to express the gratitude and how blessed I really am. I have come so far that its still sometimes hard to believe that I actually overcame everything that I have, and in just a year at that. I’ve gone from having nothing to having bikes that were worth more than my possessions, to finally having my own car again, to then having a roof over my head and to being in an amazing relationship with someone I love with my whole heart. And I’ve done it all in a year!!

It has been an emotional ride but it has made me into such a more happier, humble person. Now trust me, I still have my days where I am that cranky evil crazy lady but overall I’m just so happy, blessed and thankful for what I have in my life today. This whole experience of my life lived these past couple years, allows me to finally be able to tell my story because I now have a story worth telling. Giving me the chance to maybe help, and hoping for others to be able to come out of the life that I never thought I was going to escape. If I can do it, then I know others can too. I want to show that it is without a doubt possible! I’ve been able to rebuild relationships that I haven’t had in over six years. Relationships I thought I was never going to get back. I still have plenty though that I’m working on still, but some things take time and anything worth having wont come easy.

With everything I have achieved in this time, I can only begin to imagine what I’m going to be able to sit here and say on how much has changed and on everything I have achieved this year.

I know this past year just flew by so I really hope that this next year flies by as well because I really can’t wait to hear what all I’ve got to say!